Saturday, 13 August 2011

2005

On January 9th 2005 I started a diary which I kept for exactly one year. There were a couple of reasons for doing this; 1. Joel Barish from Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind kept a diary (and he was way cool!) and 2. I wanted to keep it as a reference document so that when I am old, jaded and miserable and I need to write a teenage character I can remember exactly what it was like to be young, jaded and miserable.

I recently decided it was time that I should find this diary and read it, and probably cringe a few times in the process. It turned out to be a rather enjoyable, funny, nostalgia-filled read. At first I thought that I hadn't really changed very much but when I break it down I think that I have grown quite considerably. I am now much more confident, far less insecure and much more consistently happy. In other words I was a moaning, miserable bastard. Okay so maybe I am still a moany, miserable bastard, but now I am moany and miserable in an ironic way, instead of an angsty teenage way. I think.

I drank a lot back then. Often. But I knew my limits. I drink less often now, but I seem to have forgotten my limits. Or rather I know them, I just prefer to surpass them. Who says people get wiser as they get older?!?

I watched Eternal Sunshine at least once a month. I've now managed to cut that down to once a year.

I didn't finish writing a single screenplay all year. I'm glad to report that this has changed; so far this year I have finished three.

I didn't have much luck at all with the ladies. Thankfully that has changed! (Hi Laura!)

A lot of the friends I made during that year are still my friends now. Best friends in some cases. There are some that I don't see any more that I wish I did and some that I'm glad I don't. Sometimes life just gets in the way. I guess that is the true test of a friendship; if it can take all that life throws at it and survive. I wonder how many of my uni friendships will survive.

I kind of wish I'd kept a diary throughout university so that I could look back on it some day and remember every small detail. Hopefully I will remember the things that are worth remembering. The rest is probably best forgotten.

"Blessed are the forgetful:
for they get the better even of their blunders."
- Nietzsche

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