Friday, 25 January 2013

WHY LEARN WHEN YOU CAN DRINK?

On Wednesday night I was struck with an overwhelming urge to get drunk. I satisfied said urge by purchasing the cheapest bottle of vodka I could find and proceeded to sit up until the early hours of Thursday morning drinking said vodka. I like getting drunk on my own. DON'T JUDGE ME! 

Well, I wasn't completely alone... I was chatting to my new Canadian best friend Luka (of Rando Calrissian fame). Best friend by default being my only Canadian friend and all, but all kinds of awesome nonetheless. In fact, I blame her entirely for my urge to drink. Whilst toying with the idea of purchasing alcohol I explained that I never learn that getting drunk on a work night seems like a great idea until the next day. With the work. And the hangover.

"Why learn when you can drink?", she replied.

Yeah, that was all it took.

Living next to a 24 hour off licence has its advantages. Within 10 minutes of reading her response I was back in front of the computer with vodka, redbull and cigarettes.

Living next to a 24 hour off licence also has its disadvantages. Mainly disadvantages for my liver, my bank balance, and for whichever poor customers have to speak to me at work the next day. A joy when hungover I am not. Fuck, I'm not a joy for customers at the best of times. Sarcastic and condescending. My customer service skills are dope, yo!

Anyways, during the conversation with Luka the subject of ReBoot popped up. Remember that show?!? Yeah neither did I at first. It's a computer-generated kids show from the 90s (It used to be on CITV in the UK) and it's about a world called Mainframe and the guardian 'spirtes' that protect it from viruses... and stuff. The entire series is on YouTube and MAN THAT SHOW WAS AWESOME! How the awesomeness had faded from my memory I have no idea.

Thank you, Luka, for reminding me of the awesomeness!

The drunker I got the more awesome it became (and the less sense it made, but whatever). I have been watching it again tonight and it pretty much still doesn't make sense most of the time but it is still awsome! Classic 90s cheesiness.

I started off by watching an episode called 'Trust No One', an X-Files parody. The Dana Scully and Fox Mulder characters are called... get this... Data Nully and Fax Modem. DATA NULLY AND FAX MODEM! Sheer genius. After I'd spent a good ten minutes laughing at their names I watched the episode and it was freakin' ace. I then watched a bunch more episodes until all the vodka was gone. Then it was like 3:30am and I figured I should probably go to sleep. Plus I'm pretty sure by this point Luka was sick of my drunken rambling and inability to type words properly. GO THE FUCK TO BED MARTIN!

I highly recommend to anyone reading this right now that you immediately go out, buy yourself a bottle of vodka, then watch the shit out of Trust No One. Or you know, just watch it sober. Whatever.

3 comments:

  1. I was actually quite impressed with your typing skills. Barely any typos at all! Bahaha.

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  2. I'm just glad to know I'm not the only one who sits in my room alone at night and drinks vodka. Sometimes I mix it with 7up and/or cranberry juice, but sometimes I'm lazy and just drink it from the bottle. You're not hardcore unless you live hardcore.

    I don't think I know the show "Reboot." Usually when I'm drinking and watching Internet videos, I gravitate towards shit about conspiracy theories or quantum physics (hi, I'm a nerd), but a 90's cartoon parody of the X-Files sounds like it's worth a drunken viewing. I'll check it out.

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  3. you guys should try a google hangout next time, I'd join!
    Also, do you know how proud of you I am that you even know about this show?

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