Tuesday, 18 February 2014

FUCK YOU, NME

A couple of weeks ago I noticed a link that someone had posted on Facebook to this article from NME concerning their list of the '500 greatest songs of all time'. Naturally I clicked the link to see what the top of the list looked like, and frankly, I was shocked. Shocked and appalled. I have said it before and I will say it again; I am no music critic, I have no idea about arrangements or structure or what makes a song technically "good" etc,. I will also state, for the record, that I have never bought an issue of NME before in my life and judging by the top five in their list of the greatest songs OF ALL TIME the odds of that ever happening just got a lot slimmer...

5. 'Last Nite' by The Strokes
4. 'How Soon Is Now?' by The Smiths
3. 'I Feel Love' by Donna Summer
2. 'Love Will Tear Us Apart' by Joy Division
1. 'Smells Like Teen Spirit' By Nirvana 

I'm not surprised in the slightest to see The Smiths and Joy Division songs in the top five, it is the NME after all. I'm not really surprised to see 'Smells Like Teen Spirit' at number one either. And I have to be honest, I had never heard of Donna Summer or that song, but whatever, 70s disco isn't really my thing... No, my main issue with this top five is MOTHERFUCKING 'LAST NITE' BY THE STROKES! ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!? THE FIFTH BEST SONG OF ALL TIME? OF ALL TIME? They can't even spell 'Night', let alone what the piece of shit song actually sounds like. Fuck, it wasn't even the fifth best song of 2001 let alone OF ALL TIME.

Okay, rant over. It feels good to get that off my chest, that has been brewing inside me ever since I clicked that link. I'm not going to post my own 'Top Five Songs of All Time' because music is fucking subjective and I fully appreciate that not everyone will have the same taste as me, but really... Do that many people like 'Last Nite'? REALLY?!? I don't believe it.

Fuck you, NME. You piece of shit hipster bullshit merchants, FUCK YOU.

3 comments:

  1. Is every Strokes song (+ their name) really just poorly conceived innuendo?

    Even if people liked that song, I can't believe it'd get to #5- it's a terrible tune, and if you actually like it; it's average at best. I wonder how they worked out the maths.

    I would back up the Joy Division nomination and Nirvana, but I'm not sure they should be this high. It says 'all time', right? In the last ~40 odd years, then probably...

    I'll stop trying to rationalise what is obviously a load of crap.

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  2. I love the Strokes, but there is no way in hell I'd put that song on any Top whatever list. None of this list makes sense. Except maybe to moody teenagers who are too clouded by hormones to make sound judgments towards Top 5 lists.

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